Blood does not make a parent.
That probably seems like the most obvious statement in the world to make, right? But you would be surprised just how many people tend to devalue or overlook Chloe's role in my son's life just because she is not his biological Mother.
What the fuck does DNA matter?
My son's biological Mother was a doting, wonderful and very loving Mother. The boy was her life. But we unfortunately lost her in 2009. That's not to say Chloe would ever replace his Mother. Never. But he is her son. And no, not because they share any genes, but because, if not me, then it is her he goes to seeking comfort. It's her he goes to with questions or silly jokes he heard at school, or her whose lap he crawls into for a cuddle in front of the TV. He feels like she is his Mother.
He started calling her "Mum," quite recently, not at the expense of his biological Mum's memoriy, though. She too remains "Mum," to him. We didn't push this move on him or even encourage it. We left him to his own choices to establish for himself the way he wanted to refer to Chloe and the role he wanted to offer her in his life, to an extent. He invited her in and after months and months of referring to her "Chloe," just suddenly started calling her "Mum" occasionally... then more frequently until now, where it's more unusla for him to NOT call her "Mum."
But people have not all been supportive or even happy about it. Why? Because of biology.
Once married, Chloe and I (and very much with my boy's approval) will set the wheels in motion for CHloe to adopt my son. I want her to have legal guardianship rights and she wants the responsibilities that come with that.
So screw the opinions of people who devalue the role of step parents. You know what a parent is to me? It's someone who will unconditionally love a child, who will eternally support and encourage a child, who adds to a child's knowledge, experiences, who cleans up the spilled milk and spilled tears and delights in every smile that child enjoys.
I know a few amazing step parents. And this is for Chloe and for them too.
You guys are inspiring to me.