tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-12368713003969467132024-02-06T20:43:18.322-08:00Real World RantingRanting, raving and misbehaving - The sounding board of Adam.Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.comBlogger328125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-32585350633332916112013-11-18T06:52:00.000-08:002013-11-18T06:52:15.985-08:00Full hands, happy heart, closed book. The goodbye post.<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This will be the last post on this blog. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The truth is that I have other digital assets kept more up to date. This blog was started many years ago when most people reading it probably knew me as Josue Habana (Second Life Avatar name).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Life has changed so much since I started writing here and I hardly recognise the individual who began this blog. I'm now a Father of 3, a husband and a business man. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Life has changed my schedule and love has changed my heart.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I've used this as a sounding board and as somewhere to process feelings at time. I've been guilty (years ago) of using it as a weapon at times. It was juvenile behaviour and, as I said, I don't even recognise the guy who did that anymore.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Very few people who read this blog would recognise me these days. The exceptions, of course, being my real world family and friends. But I've evolved in so many ways in recent years. I've shaken off the bitterness and hatred that polluted my attitude. I've shaken off the self-pitying side of myself that I used to blame on the passing of my parents. The truth is, my Mother would have been mortified to think I got so down and out about what she considered a natural part of life.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm not proud of some of my past behaviours. But I'm incredibly proud of what my life has become and I feel blessed to have the love of so many beautiful friends and family. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Thanks for reading, the handful of you that do. Merry Christmas =)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Adios</span>Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-69849640079054185172013-09-09T08:46:00.004-07:002013-09-09T08:46:38.496-07:00Choices<div class="MsoNormal">
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If we were able to turn back time,<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Re-make all our decisions,<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Take back choices,<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Undo angry voices<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And pull back words<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We wish we’d never said,<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">There’d be a lengthy list <o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Of things I’d unsay<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Of things I’d undo<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">But
I’d still choose you.</span><o:p></o:p></span></span></b></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are the best choice I’ve made,<o:p></o:p></span></span></div>
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The thing I’ve gotten the most right.</span><o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-51365458819855577902013-08-05T03:54:00.002-07:002013-08-05T03:54:42.965-07:00Believe<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I've been fortunate enough to meet and know a lot of talented people. I've been close to talented writers, teachers, artists, musicians, dancers, actors and business people.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Talent manifests itself in so many different ways. Yet any type of talent has a common enemy - <b>lacking self belief.</b></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If you don't believe in you, you make it harder for anyone else to believe in you.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I watch many I've believed in over the years succeed, sometimes from afar and sometimes from up close. And it feels wonderful.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A good friend of mine landed a book publishing deal and her first novel will be out in a month. She can still hardly believe it having doubted her own capabilities for so very long.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My wife's artwork will be exhibited locally in Autumn. She can hardly believe it, having struggled for so long to believe as much in her own talent as those around her did. As soon as she developed a bit of self-confidence, her natural talents came through bigger and stronger.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My son has been enrolled into a professional football league club's youth academy, despite having spent a couple of years frustrated at being 'too small' in his own eyes. Once that mindset changed and he started to believe he was a good footballer, his talents shone.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And there are so many more of you out there succeeding in making the most of your talents.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But it's difficult to do until you see in yourself what those closest to you see. Open your eyes, talented folks, and look at what you can achieve when you just believe in yourself.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's pretty amazing.</span>Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-86824568112831669462013-07-02T01:29:00.001-07:002013-07-02T01:29:22.753-07:00Dedicating More of MeThe sale of my business is finally complete. It leaves me and my family in a position where we can do two things we really want to do:<br />
<br />
<br />
<ul>
<li>Move to a house Chloe's been eyeing up for some time. It's still on the market and it's now in budget.</li>
<li>Spend more time together as a family</li>
</ul>
<div>
No matter how much I tried to have the office run itself so some degree (I brought in some excellent management to whom I remain truly grateful for all the hard work) I still ended up in the office for 12 hour days at a time far too regularly.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
I can't complain though. After a relatively short time, the business and its clients sold for a sum I could never have expected and I had a wonderful time setting it up.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
After my business sale completed last week, I set the wheels in motion to acquire an established ecommerce business that is flatlining in its marketing efforts. This will be something more home based and something Chloe gets involved with too. The distribution centre for this business is run well and I intend to keep that management team in place. My bit will be in the marketing - the bit I love. It means I can spend more time at home and get into a position where my working days are a more normal length and I can see more of my three children.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<b>I owe them myself. </b></div>
<div>
<b><br /></b></div>
<div>
I never wanted to be the type of Father who is getting home long after his girls are in bed. There were periods in the last few months where I could go two weeks at a time without being able to get home in time to check through my son's homework. Granted, my wife does a wonderful job of taking care of all that. But I miss it too much. And no job or business in the world is worth giving up quality time with my children for.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Here's to the next chapter. It starts with a promise.</div>
<div>
<b><br /></b></div>
Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-32942431744976880092013-05-21T04:33:00.001-07:002013-05-21T04:33:46.689-07:00Second Chances
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<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">Things change.
And people do. And I believe in second chances.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">My son’s
Grandmother (his biological Mother’s Mother) is Russian and lives in Russia.
After his Mother died, we tried our hardest to make it work so that she could
see him and he could see her. That was, of course, until she threatened to take
me to court for full custody. She was advised by her own legal team her chances
would be limited, given the fact he had lived with me full time before his
Mother’s death, was in happy, loving and
secure home environment and has expressed his wish to remain in it. So, instead
she embarked upon a plan to effectively kidnap him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">Since this plan
was discovered, my son has not seen his Grandmother.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">Last week, we
received a letter from his Babushka. It was full of apologies. She misses her
Grandson and she needs him back in her life. “Please call me,” she asked at the
end and included new contact details.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I agonised over
it for a day or two, spoke to my wife and agonised some more. But I realised
that I forgive her. She tried to take the most precious thing in my life from
me, but I hold no further grudges. It all worked out well – he is here with me
and he is happy.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">She wrote in her
letter about her behaviour being the result of losing her daughter. She told me
it was an irrational reaction to a painful situation she never believes any
parent should face.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I believed her
letter. It has an air of the genuine about it. I don’t think she’s up to
anything unsavoury.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">But it wasn’t just
my forgiveness she needed. For a young boy, my son is mighty in tune with what’s
going on. He knows why he doesn’t see Babushka anymore. He accepts it. So I
showed him the letter.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">“What do you
think, kiddo?” I asked him<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">“What do you
think, Dad?” he replied.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">“I think that we
have two choices. We either believe her or we don’t. If we believe her, we call
her. And if we don’t believe her, then we don’t call her. We forget all about
it.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I didn’t want to
share with him my opinion. I wanted him to decide free of any influence.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">“Let me think
about it,” he said and he took the letter from my hands and went off to his
room.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">He emerged an
hour or so later.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">“I believe her,
Dad,” he told me. “But we both need to believe her don’t we? Do you believe
her?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">“Yes.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">So we called her.
I spoke to her first and as soon as I said, “It’s Adam,” she burst into tears.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">“I’m so relieved
to hear from you.” <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">Her English is
improved from the last time we met. She tells me she’s been to classes in the
hope she will see her Grandson again one day and just in case his Russian is
rusty after so long in the UK without any native Russian speakers in his life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I heard genuine
relief, I heard an overwhelming sense of apology and self-accountability for
what happened. And that was enough for me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">“Would you like
to speak to him?”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">It didn’t need an
answer. They spoke for 10 or 15 minutes. We agreed we would call her back again
this week and we said we would talk about her coming here to see him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I don’t trust her
enough yet <i>not </i>to be with them when
these meetings happen. Forgiveness? Yes. But trust is hard won. And that will
take more time. But my son is willing to give it a try and I owe it to the
memory of his beautiful hearted Mother to do my best to make it work.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">So we’ll arrange
a visit. After all, this broken hearted ageing lady has already lost a
daughter. She shouldn’t lose a Grandson as well.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;"><br /></span></div>
<!--EndFragment--><br />
<!--EndFragment-->Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-2323553388312194072013-04-12T09:09:00.002-07:002013-04-12T09:09:54.179-07:00Letting Go
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<!--StartFragment-->
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">Regret tends not
to get anyone very far. Not ever.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">We can (and very
much should) be apologetic for our mistakes. We should admit our wrongs,
acknowledge and, where required, apologise for them. But we shouldn’t spend our
lives feeling bad about them, regretting them…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">We have to move
on. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I’ve been, at
times, an asshole of a boyfriend, husband, brother, son and friend. In times
when I had no clue what I wanted from my life or during times I’ve been living
in a past, I’ve made decisions that have hurt others.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">And I have said
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">But regret, if
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and giving your all to those around you.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I made a decision
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human disposition. How you respond to them and the learnings you take from them
is what will ultimately define you as a person.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I was, once upon
a time, a pretty unreliable brother. I was an awful boyfriend, a lethargic son
(‘sure, Mum… I’ll call you later.’). I’ve changed. I’ve grown as a human being.
My children and my wife have changed me for the better. Happiness and genuine
satisfaction with my life has changed me for the better.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">We cannot live
wrapped up in mistakes we’ve made. And it feels good to let them go.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-46280523100745067762013-04-11T15:11:00.001-07:002013-04-11T15:11:46.044-07:00Faith Restored
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<br />
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">She told me I’d return
to God again when the time was right for me. She told me He’d wait for me.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">At the time, of
course, I ignored the idea.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">But my Mother was
right.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I started going
to church again a couple of months ago. At first, it was to accompany my Sister
and Wife and to give my eldest son the opportunity of exposure to the Catholic
Faith my family lived so staunchly by. I believe him to have sufficient
intelligence, common sense of individual sense of identity that he will make up
his own mind about God. But I owe him exposure – I owe him visibility over
Faith so he can make an informed decision.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I say ‘at first’
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<br /></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I believe again.
It didn’t happen overnight. It was a gradual reintroduction to a God who was
really always there for me despite my rejection of Him.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I’m not a perfect
Catholic. But I am working on it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-15583551417207453252013-04-07T13:31:00.001-07:002013-04-07T13:31:27.457-07:00Love Yourself
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">When I met my now
wife, Chloe, she was, as she is now, a beautiful UK size 14 (US size 12). She
felt insecure about her weight for the longest time and, before our wedding,
she took to an intense diet and exercise regime.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">She lost weight, dropping
from a 14 (US 12) to a size 10/12 (8/10). And she was happy, briefly.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">But she soon
became obsessed even after the wedding with calorie counting. We’ve always
eaten relatively healthily anyway, but she took to stopping herself having
meals out a lot of time and generally became a bit unhappy with her regime.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">With two babies
under her belt these days, she’s back at a size 14. We’re healthy. We exercise
regularly, we eat balanced meals. She just naturally sits at a size 14 and
she’s beautiful for it. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">Today, as she
tried on a new dress for a friend’s wedding next weekend, I told her:<o:p></o:p></span></div>
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<br /></div>
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<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">“You look
incredible.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">“Thank you,” she
responded. “I think this is the happiest I’ve ever been with my body.”<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I’m so thrilled
she finally feels content. She’s not stick thin. She’s not meant to be stick
thin. She’s healthy, feminine, curvy and beautiful. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span lang="EN-US" style="font-family: Arial;">I love her for
it. But most importantly (and it’s taken her years) she finally loves herself
for it too.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-75187451682661509472013-02-05T11:13:00.000-08:002013-02-05T11:13:27.370-08:00My Happiness Looks Like This<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKJGh4Tr0jkmaunPppmWMxyYcgywlIVNnU6i7EfUTyjm5YLR0aY9cwO23qKy0PYloSvfyHM0INt98-5aa8erS8WEGL_ERLcXdtLGpYRgYPHpl_KOn2KFCBhMRmAJcB-Ci-NHCmGrjzYxE/s1600/Screen+Shot+2013-02-05+at+18.58.03.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="305" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKJGh4Tr0jkmaunPppmWMxyYcgywlIVNnU6i7EfUTyjm5YLR0aY9cwO23qKy0PYloSvfyHM0INt98-5aa8erS8WEGL_ERLcXdtLGpYRgYPHpl_KOn2KFCBhMRmAJcB-Ci-NHCmGrjzYxE/s320/Screen+Shot+2013-02-05+at+18.58.03.png" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Happiness looks different for different people. For some people, happiness is fine food, it's jewellery. For some, it's business success. For some, it's meeting a weight loss or a health goal, for some it is succeeding with physical challenges.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">A lot of things make me smile, including some of the above (business success and succeeding in physical challenges). But just one thing makes me truly, truly happy: <b>my family.</b></span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For me, happiness looks my one month old baby girl sleeping, or gargling at me as we sit awake at 3 or 4 in the morning while the rest of the world sleeps. It's my elder daughter, now a toddler, running to me the second I get in the door for a big cuddle. It's my son coming home from school beaming from ear to ear because he got a great grade or scored a winning goal for the football team. It's my wife waking me up in the morning with a cup of tea and a smile despite the fact that she's probably been up several times in the night with the baby. It's coming home after a long day to the four people who mean the most to me on the whole damn planet and knowing how lucky I am that I have them. It's seeing my sister and my nephew settled and happy, it's seeing my cousin and best friend settle down too. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Cos it all worked out in the end.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">For some, my lifestyle would be nothing more than monotony. I work, I come home, I spend my evenings with the family, I get up, I go to work, I come home, I spend my evenings with my family. I spend my weekends with my family. I change nappies, I clean up sick, I get up in the night to wipe tears. If you'd asked me 10 years ago my opinion on this lifestyle, you'd have been told that this would <b>never, ever happen</b> to me. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But it did. And for me this is all I need.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We've all experienced loss before, I know. And having experienced the loss of some so close, I feel all the more blessed to have what I have. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And yes, I'll curse at 4am tomorrow when the sound of cries pierce the air and, despite having been asleep for only a couple of hours and having to be up in the next couple, I will have to climb out of bed and attend to a baby. But the curse will last no more than a micro second. Because then I'll peer into her cot and she'll smile when I lift her from it. We'll go downstairs and I'll give her a bottle and we'll sit in the dark together. For that half an hour or so as she feeds and then slowly drifts back off to her dreams, it will feel, as it does every night we do this, like there's nobody else in the world awake. And that feeling there, sitting in the dark silently and drifting off to sleep with my baby daughter is the most precious one in the world.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That right there, that is what happiness is for me.</span>Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-17218190580208006912013-01-03T02:06:00.001-08:002013-01-03T02:06:56.171-08:00Welcome to the World Olivia Rose<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">2013 has started in the most wonderful way possible. My 3rd child was born a little early, but perfectly healthy shortly after 6am on New Year's Day. </span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue",Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">Welcome to the world, Olivia Rose, my sweet, sweet, beautiful baby girl. I love you as though I've loved you all my life, yet we've only just met.</span><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgS3ZWOUDKqrAz6fJ0FQjmFm-XAylmTQAA7ytwjIdfwIzhrtfmfRwwjwkvkT52Q5tIOsAzNBeMw_SMFPGE6F2tW7MIJtUwVRQrT3AJTgcjKVV_hikLX9DE63MIUiWFqL8NYjq9VvMuR_vA/s1600/OR.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgS3ZWOUDKqrAz6fJ0FQjmFm-XAylmTQAA7ytwjIdfwIzhrtfmfRwwjwkvkT52Q5tIOsAzNBeMw_SMFPGE6F2tW7MIJtUwVRQrT3AJTgcjKVV_hikLX9DE63MIUiWFqL8NYjq9VvMuR_vA/s320/OR.png" width="288" /></a></div>
Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-73413754768089237402012-12-07T14:05:00.001-08:002012-12-07T14:05:05.004-08:00Christmas Creeps Up and my Best Bud is Back<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Christmas is less than 3 weeks. How did that happen?! It came around so quickly again. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">On Friday 21st December, I'll leave the office for a whopping 6 weeks off (thanks to Emma, my new Operations Manager, I can leave without feeling as though the world will implode)!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">By the time I get back into the office, I'll have celebrated Christmas, my son's birthday, the New Year and will have a new baby son or daughter.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A lot going on.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">One of the most exciting things going on? <span style="font-size: large;">Craigy boy is back! </span>One of my best friends and his lovely wife moved to the other side of the world a while back. He arrived back a few days ago. It's like he never left. He's totally fallen in love with my little girl, who's now toddling around and mumbling little words. He can't believe how much my boy has grown. And he has his own little bundle of joy as well.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Well, Craig, <span style="font-size: large;">I guess we grew up. </span>Instead of spending our first night out in ages in a club, we spent it in a quiet pub talking about (swooning over) our respective families.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It's better than it's ever been for both of us.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And as I'm unlikely to post again before Christmas, a Merry Christmas to you all. I wish you health, comfort, love and happiness. All of you. You know who you are :)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-42327224184425941792012-11-06T03:52:00.001-08:002012-11-06T03:52:25.048-08:00Controlling the Control Freak with the Chimp Paradox<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I'm a control freak.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I like to be completely in control of every single element of my life. I think that's probably natural. But there are things we can't control:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We can't control cancer</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We can't control mortality</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We can't control the weather</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We can't control the feelings of others</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Hell, most of the time we cannot control our own feelings</span></li>
</ul>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm learning to control my control freakish behaviours with this awesome book, <i><a href="http://www.chimpparadox.co.uk/" target="_blank">The Chimp Paradox</a>.</i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.youtube.com/embed/zdsULCgqflE?feature=player_embedded' frameborder='0'></iframe></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">This book is awesome. It breaks down the mind into 3 sections:</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">- The human</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">- The chimp</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">- The computer</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The human is the part of you that works on fact, that works without emotion and that responds based on concrete fact.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The chimp is the part of you that behaves based on emotion. The chump uses instinct and feeling to formulate its behaviours and responses.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The computer is the part of your mind that handles pre-programmed behaviours and these can be stored there by either the human or the chimp.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Identifying at any time which part of your brain is in control (the human or the chimp is as simple as asking yourself: <b style="font-style: italic;">"Do I want to feel like this or behave like this?" </b>If the answer is no, then it's chimp behaviour.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Now, I'm not usually one for 'psycho babble' but this book is incredible. Just understanding your behaviours (the ones out of your immediate control) is incredibly powerful. If you're someone who struggles with anger, jealousy, erratic emotions or misjudged overreaction then this is for you.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Enjoy :)</span></div>
Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-86738188829108525142012-10-22T09:19:00.000-07:002012-10-22T09:19:07.627-07:00Stuff That Scares Me<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">"You're not afraid of ANYTHING," </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">said my son this morning as I swiftly took up a spider in a tissue and set it free out of the front door (as Chloe screamed on the stairs ;-)).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Yes I am," I assured him.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Like what?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But before I had chance to answer he was distracted by the school holidays hyperactivity that sets in on the first Monday of the break and he'd rushed off into the garden to play football with our crazy dogs.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I was left washing the breakfast dishes with my thoughts.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I'm not as afraid as I used to be.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But I'm still scared of some things:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<br />
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I am scared of not being a good enough husband. Chloe deserves only the best. I just hope my best will always be good enough.</span></li>
</ul>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'm scared that my son and daughter and 3rd unborn child are growing up in a world with so much cruelty and evil. It scares me that one day they'll be out there as adults faced with it. </span></li>
</ul>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But I'm even more scared of being an over protective parent. I believe children have to make their own mistakes and, to some degree, discover the ugliness of humanity for themselves in many ways. It's what teaches us to protect ourselves.</span></li>
</ul>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'm scared to death of losing those I love. Aren't we all?</span></li>
</ul>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
</div>
<div>
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'm scared of a side of my character I know lurks somewhere. I have a tendency in the difficult times to disappear into a hole of my own self pity and it's during these times I push everyone else around me away. I am scared that side of myself is still there somewhere, though I haven't seen it for many years now.</span></li>
</ul>
<div>
<br /></div>
</div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">But as I type this up sitting on the floor in a newly painted baby bedroom with a laptop, I know that in reality my fears are no different to those of anybody else. Will I be a good enough parent? Will I be a good enough spouse? Will I be just good enough? Will I be ok? Will those I love be ok?</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We're human. We're all scared of something. It's life.</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And when I look at my little family and our 3rd soon-to-be arrival, I know that the fears are worth it. Because for every moment I spend worrying about them all, I have a hundred moments of sheer, unrivalled joy.</span></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-24376185276318907442012-09-27T03:54:00.003-07:002012-09-27T03:55:44.514-07:00To Mothers<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For all of the amazing Mothers, step mothers and mother figures, you are amazing.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">All of you.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here's to the Chloes of the world who are rocks to their children, sturdy, consistent and always there with unconditional love and sound advice.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here's to the Staceys of Manchester who work exhaustingly long hours from and are full time Mums too - cooking, cleaning, working, loving... How do you do it?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here's to the Lisas of California whose parenting makes their children want to be their best and whose love is eternal.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here's to the Sarahs of Nottingham who let their grown up children make their own mistakes but who will love them forever no matter what those errors are.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here's to the Beths of Newcastle who open their homes and their hearts to troubled teenagers whose own parents have failed them. You give yourself completely and it's incredible.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here's to the step Mothers and step Mother figures all over the world who have selflessly given themselves to children not biologically theirs, for however long or short a period. To touch the lives of children not your own (whether for a short time or forever) is one of the most selfless and precious gifts a woman can give.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here's to the Mothers who've passed and who we think of every single day.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Here's to the unwavering advice Mothers are able to give, to the wisdom they impart and to the unforgiving lengths they go to in order to protect their children.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I've said it before and I will say it again - you amaze me.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-10192327519836394652012-09-26T08:04:00.001-07:002012-09-26T08:05:27.478-07:00The Things I Should Say Every Single Day<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I was running late this morning. I jetted out of the house with a slice of toast hanging out of my mouth. As I got into the car, I received a text from Chloe:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Here's the kiss you didn't have time for xxxxxxx"</span><br />
<span style="font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>I got out of the car, went back into the house and kissed my wife. Because I should never be in too much of a rush to do it.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">My Mother used to tell me day in, day out that I should consider every single goodbye as the last, even just the goodbye I uttered as a teenager leaving the house to go to school every morning. She did that. As we were growing up, it was part of our morning routine. Mum would tell my sister and me how much she loved us over breakfast and she'd kiss us before she left for work. Every single day, without fail and (much to my horror as a sulky teen) regardless of whether we had friends around!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Yes, I was late this morning. But it was a small price to pay for a proper morning goodbye.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I will never be in too much of a rush to kiss my love goodbye in the morning. And it's not just the goodbyes I'm sometimes guilty of cutting corners on. There are so many things I should say every single day that I don't.</span><br />
<br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So, Chloe, my wife, my soulmate, my purpose, here are the things I should make the time to tell you every single day, because these are the definition of truth:</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I know nothing truer than my love for you and our children. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I still take the time every single morning to watch you as you wake up. In that state of half-sleepiness, you are at your most vulnerable. And it's as you are in this state that I am reminded of how much I love you and how much I live to protect you.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You are sexy. You are so, so beautiful to me and become more so with every single day that passes.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You're the funniest person I know.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You're the most creative person I know.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You're one of the most intelligent people I've ever had in my life.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">You're driven, ambitious and that is the most admirable quality for a woman to have.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">You are as wonderful a Mother as my own was.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I feel grateful every single day to have you in my life.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For the first time in my life, I believe I was made for someone. I was made for you and we fit.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Everything is better because you're in my life.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Chloe, I will never leave the house without kissing you again, my love xxx</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<br />Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-39633560858421145982012-09-15T16:10:00.002-07:002012-09-15T16:10:57.427-07:00We Don't Unlove<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Humans are not built to 'unlove.' We don't get to choose who we love, when we love them and when we switch it off.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And it's on that basis and understanding that I was very sympathetic to the tears shed publicly by Chloe's ex at a wedding we went to today. Chloe's ex is a woman, a very bright and ambitious woman, kind, funny and sweet. She saw our little family, our son, tiny daughter and the ever growing bump that will be our 3rd child and she broke down into tears.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">They've had their share of nasty exchanges over the last year, Chloe and Kirsty. Kirsty accuses Chloe of<b><span style="color: red;"> 'selling out to a boring straight lifestyle'</span></b> and breaking her heart in the process. Chloe accuses Kirsty of turning some of their mutual friends against Chloe.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The truth is that Chloe and Kirsty split up. Some time later, Chloe and I fell in love and that seemed to mark with no degree of uncertainty that there would be no reunion for Kirsty and Chloe. And Kirsty hated me for the longest time. I understand it. I would have felt the same in her situation.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But tonight, when she broke down in tears at the wedding reception of a mutual friend, I felt her pain acutely. Chloe walked away to take the children away from that situation. I would ordinarily have followed, not keen to get into an argument in public. But I felt the need to talk to Kirsty and so I signalled to Chloe that I'd catch her up.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Can I get you a drink?" I asked her. "Maybe it's time you and I had a chat that is made up of more than a series of expletives."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Ok."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"I'm not getting you a red wine though. It has to be something clear in case you throw it over my shirt shortly..."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">She managed a laugh.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We sat in a quiet corner of an otherwise bustling afternoon wedding reception full of happy adults, excited children and proud family-of-the-newly-weds. We said nothing for a few minutes. She was sobbing and I immediately felt this sense of compassion - not just because I am now married to the woman she cried for, but because I have felt what she is feeling. And I understand with such precision how helpless and full of unending sorrow she feels right now.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Look," I said. "I think you and I have more in common than you like to think."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Adam," she said, "With all due respect I don't think we have a single thing in common."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"We both know what heartbreak feels like," I ventured. "And we both know what true love feels like. And we both think Chloe is the most wonderful human being on Earth."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">She cried more and I felt like I'd said the wrong thing, so decided to stop talking.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">She eventually piped up.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"You're right. We have that in common. But I hate you for taking her from me."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"I didn't take her, Kirsty. You were already broken up. I fell in love with her. There's no crime in that. She fell for me and there's nothing we could have done about it. You know we can't control those things, cos if we could you'd have turned off how you feel about her right now. You'd have just stopped."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Maybe. But maybe this intense pain is the only thing keeping me connected to her."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">We talked some more. We developed an understanding. She will never like me, but she knows now that I understand her. And that I am not the reason that she and Chloe didn't work out.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">She decided not long after that she was going to leave. She wasn't feeling up for it. She approached Chloe as she was going to leave, pulled her in for a (somewhat reluctant) hug and said,</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Your family is perfect. And you're made for one another. Good luck."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That was a beautiful gesture. And one I won't forget for a long time.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Because the truth is that as humans, we are not meant to <b>unlove.</b> We're not built to turn off emotions when they're inconvenient. We're simply not ever able to learn to not love someone. It either happens or it doesn't. And for me, love is something that lasts a lifetime. I've learnt that about myself. <b><span style="color: #cc0000;">I don't fall out of love.</span></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">But sometimes love transitions and changes slightly. And we all learn to move on eventually.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I hope Kirsty gets there soon.</span>Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-80149317882659940692012-09-08T14:54:00.000-07:002012-09-08T14:54:53.057-07:00Breaking Up and Loving Again
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<br />
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial;">First, I learned to breathe without you. <o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 36.0pt; text-indent: 36.0pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial;">Then I
learned to live without you. <o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 108.0pt; text-indent: 36.0pt;">
<i><span style="font-family: Arial;">Finally, I
learned to love without you.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: 108.0pt; text-indent: 36.0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">We’ve all been there, that
tragic, Earth stopping moment that the ‘love of your life’ tells you it’s over.
Your throat swells and it seems like hours and hours before you can breathe
again. But in reality, it’s seconds.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">Yes, really. Seconds. Within
seconds of hearing that information, you’ve already learned (albeit you don’t
really process it then) that you can breathe without that individual in your
life.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">You eventually accept,
though perhaps don’t like, that the relationship is over. And you spend hours
and hours during the nights crying alone in the dark. You try to carry on with
the day to day but everything seems to have her name on it or a reminder of
her. You see someone who looks like her and have to stop yourself staring. You
hear a song you both loved. You see a book you know she would love. You
experience a moment and wish she were there to share it. You’re not really
living without her. She’s just absent while you continue to live with her in
your mind and your heart.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">But as the days continue,
she interrupts your thoughts less and less. And one day, you climb in bed and
realise that you didn’t think of her once during the daylight hours.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">Eventually, she stops
visiting your thoughts in the night too. You don’t do anything specifically to
stop it. It just happens. Time takes care of things. You stop wondering what
you could have done differently. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">This is the point at which
you’ve started to claim your heart back. You’re not quite ready to give it to
someone else though, not until you have every last piece of it.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">But you get there
eventually. You do. You realise you have it all back, every last piece. And
maybe it’s a little bit broken or cracked in places. But that doesn’t matter.
As long as you have it all, that’s what counts.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">Finally, you meet someone
else. They accept that your heart is cracked in places and you must accept that
of their heart too. But as long as you both have all of the pieces, you can
help one another put the bits back together.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">And for the luckiest amongst
us, we realise that what we thought was the love of our life was not. It was a
love, yes. But it was never meant to last forever. It was a gift while it
lasted and you learned from it, but it was never supposed to last forever. We
realise this because we find something that puts everything else into
perspective. We find a soul mate. <o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">I found a soul mate in
someone who had been just a friend for years. And we have built a beautiful
home and are blessed with an amazing little family.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal">
<span style="font-family: Arial;">And the world is wonderful
once again </span><span style="font-family: Wingdings; mso-ascii-font-family: Arial; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-hansi-font-family: Arial; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;">J</span><span style="font-family: Arial; mso-bidi-font-family: "Times New Roman"; mso-bidi-theme-font: minor-bidi;"><o:p></o:p></span></div>
<!--EndFragment-->Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-11311201363030345222012-09-04T15:44:00.002-07:002012-09-04T15:44:29.712-07:00I See You<div>
My Darling,</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
I see you. I see you sometimes clearer than I see myself. I see the outline of all the things that scarred your beautiful heart and I trace my finger gently along their outline, casting them carefully away.<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Your flaws are a part of what makes you so beautiful, my love. The scars you bear on your beautiful heart have shaped it into what it is and what you are now. </div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Love was never kind to you, was it? Love seemed never to favour you and instead seemed to scorn you. Love was what seemed to cause you most of the hurt you endured. That will hurt no more now - because I'll protect your heart. I will protect it with my life, my love.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
This time, love will be kind. Love will be fair. Love will be sweet. Because it's mutual, because it's unconditional and because it's the only thing I've ever truly believed I can give you forever.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Your Soul Mate</div>
<div>
xx</div>
Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-91956840871231436942012-08-20T03:04:00.003-07:002012-08-20T03:04:33.027-07:00One Year Old TodayHow time flies. A year ago I cradled you in my arms for the first time and fell head over heels in love with you. Now, you're toddling around unaided (albeit spending a remarkable amount of time falling onto your bum!) and every time I walk in the door you toddle over to me, arms stretched out in a 'pick me up,' pose and you know I can't resist.<br />
<br />
You have your Daddy wrapped around your little finger. You know if you look at me that way, smile and stretch out those chubby little arms that even when you're supposed to be going to sleep, Daddy's going to pick you up for a cuddle.<br />
<br />
I can't help it.<br />
<br />
You've got your big brother wrapped around your little finger too. He's just like me - can't resist your beautiful little smile and 'please pick me up,' eyes. How you two adore one another! Watching him fall in love with you just as Mummy and I have has made the first year of your life all the more beautiful.<br />
<br />
I love you. I love you, your big brother and your Mummy as much as any human being has ever loved others. You are all so precious to me and fill my life with such unrivalled joy.<br />
<br />
Happy Birthday, Darling. Don't go growing up too quickly, though...<br />
<br />
<br />Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-30778363372147338992012-07-31T02:51:00.003-07:002012-07-31T02:51:31.793-07:00Overcoming the Fear of HappinessChloe and I have been nervously ecstatic since April. Nervously because the last time we were ecstatic about something like this, it was taken away and it's human nature to be cautious when something has been taken once.<br />
<br />
But we've decided to overcome that nervousness and spent last week sharing the good news with family and friends that we're expecting a baby in January. The pregnancy came just a couple of months after a miscarriage earlier this year. Quicker than expected but we'll take that as a gift. And we've been assured time and time again by medical professionals that everything looks exactly as it should this time.<br />
<br />
We're being careful though - in other words I am fussing way too much and not letting Chloe do a great deal. (Sorry, babe. I'll stop being so annoying in a few months!).<br />
<br />
But in January, we'll be a family of five. The two of us, our son, our daughter and our new baby. A boy or a girl? I don't mind. I just want a healthy baby.<br />
<br />
<h4>
Our Baby Girl</h4>
Our daughter will turn one in August and she's just taken her first steps. Yesterday she let go of my hand and took five or six completely unaided steps before falling forwards into the couch, crying a bit, laughing a bit and then doing it all over again. She's been walking aided by her brother for some time and is keen to master the art solo so she can chase him when he's not in sight!<br />
<br />
<h4>
Our Grown Up Boy</h4>
<div>
Our boy has just completed another year of school and ended it with a glowing report.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
"He's intelligent, polite and a real joy to teach. I'm really going to miss him next year," were the closing words of his teacher.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
We're so proud of him and of the gentleman he is becoming at such a tender age.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Having children has completely changed me and added a layer of meaning to my life that I could never, ever have hoped for. I get to be me. I get to have my husband and wife time with Chloe. I get to have my business time. But the bulk of my time is with the family unit, where I am Dad.</div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
Dad in my household means: <b>nappy changing, joke telling, cuddling, helping with homework, kissing cuts and bruises better, making the best hot chocolate in the world, answering the questions of the universe, drawing pictures, doign jigsaws, playing chess, playing football, making funny faces accompanies with bizarre noises and just being there.</b></div>
<div>
<br /></div>
<div>
It's the best job I've ever had. And I'm overcoming the fear of being happy about it.</div>Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-45038846156834431482012-06-14T05:39:00.002-07:002012-06-14T05:39:59.342-07:00Inspired by a Lazy Day In Bed<b><i>Thanks to my Sister, Chloe and I were able to take a day off the world yesterday as she took the kids for a night and day and I took a day out of the office.</i></b><br />
<b><i><br /></i></b><br />
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Let’s not get up today.<o:p></o:p></div>
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No, let’s just stay in bed.<o:p></o:p></div>
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We’ll kiss and talk and laugh<o:p></o:p></div>
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And fall in love some more instead.<o:p></o:p></div>
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<br /></div>
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Let’s not face the world today<o:p></o:p></div>
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Let’s leave our chores undone.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Let’s make some time for love<o:p></o:p></div>
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My love, let’s make some time for fun.</div>
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<br /></div>
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We had a wonderful day yesterday. We weren't parents, bosses... we weren't anything other than one another's. An entire day where we switched the world off and spent the day in bed with movies, board games, laughter and love.</div>
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<div class="MsoNormal" style="text-align: left;">
What a wonderful day. Simple pleasures.</div>
<!--EndFragment-->Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-3757198582655792432012-06-11T14:23:00.000-07:002012-06-11T14:23:37.279-07:00Understanding Our Faults<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"I did something I shouldn't have done today, Dad," my boy told me as he clambered into the car after his first day back at school following the half term holiday.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"What did you do?" I quizzed?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"I talked back to my teacher. I'm sorry."</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My boy is bright. Very bright. And he's cheeky in an endearing way most of the time. But when he's adamant that he's right there's no changing his mind and he has an occasional tendency to give a little too much cheek to his elders.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">He told me the tale. It was a very minor talk back but his teacher rightly told him that very rude and inappropriate and it left him feeling bad.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Did you apologise?"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Straight away. And again at the end of the day. But I want to buy her a box of chocolates and I want to write a sorry card tonight."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And that's exactly what he did tonight. Tomorrow he'll take them in and apologise again. He'll probably lose sleep over it tonight because he's a worrier. But I think it's good for him to feel bad about it!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">I'm proud of him.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Not for talking back, of course, but because h<b><span style="color: red;">e was able to acknowledge he was wrong about something and swallow his pride sufficiently to apologise and put it right.</span></b></span><br />
<span style="color: red; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That's something that hasn't always been a strength of mine - admitting my flaws and mistakes. And there are many.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span><br />
<br />
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm too stubborn</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I wallow</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I push people away</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In the past, I've taken love and loyalty and failed to give enough back</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I've been guilty of negativity</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I've taken people for granted</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Even today, I have a childish tendency to sulk when I don't get my way (despite now how having two children of my own)!</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I'm not about to start writing 'sorry' cards ;-) but I am getting better at admitting faults.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">My young son, though, learnt all about that a lot quicker than I did.</span></div>Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-56519132398390319702012-06-06T07:19:00.002-07:002012-06-06T07:19:38.254-07:00FreedomThere's a spring in my step as the summer approaches. It didn't occur to me that the reason might be as simple as 'freedom,' until Chloe mentioned last night:<br />
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"I've not heard you say you regret anything in weeks."<br />
<br />
"What?" I asked, puzzled.<br />
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"It's been a while since I've heard you say that you wish you'd done something or you wish you hadn't said something. Just an observation. That's all."<br />
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And she's right.<br />
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I'm free of regret, of guilt. Free of self blaming for things in the past that didn't work out, beyond cursing myself for things I never said to my Mother or my son's Mother or my friend, free of any guilt for the hurt of others, free of all of it. Because it's all worked out ok.<br />
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There are some people I miss terrible (Mum, Anje, Amy...) and always will. But they all knew I loved them sincerely. They knew it and I know they loved me too. So no more regrets for a goodbye I never got to say to Amy and no regrets for the Sunday afternoons I left my Mother's half hour early after visiting for dinner. Because she knew I loved her. They all did.<br />
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No more regrets for hurt shared between myself and former lovers and friends. No regrets for vicious words and I hold no grudges for their vicious words either (you're ok, Andy ;-)). <b>Because it's all worked out</b>.<br />
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Of those still here, everyone is happy, has found happiness and whatever has happened in the past has led those people to a place that they are happy with.<br />
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Of those no longer here, not one of them would ever want me to wallow in regret or in grief. We cannot help but miss them, but life must continue. That's an incredibly valuable lesson I have learnt from my son - a young boy with a man's heart.<br />
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And I am free. I am liberated of the 'what if,' the 'if only' and self doubting.<br />
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Now, pride. Pride for the fact I was able to be in those people's lives even if only for a short time. Pride at being a good Father (it's the job I am best at). Pride at being a caring husband.<br />
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I am so, so lucky:<br />
<br />
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<ul>
<li>I have a son who is the apple of my eye, the sun in my sky and the music that turns the beat of my heart into a song. He is perfection in breathing form.</li>
<li>I have a baby girl who is a Princess in her own right. Almost 10 months old and already skilled in the art of wrapping Daddy around her little finger. She's stolen my heart and I don't want her to give it back.</li>
<li>My wife. My soulmate. She and I have both taken crooked paths to lead us together. We went our ways, both thought we fell in love with others and both repaired broken hearts before finding one another again. And it was worth it. I appreciate her all the more for knowing how much more she is than everything I have known before. We are imperfect. But we're perfect for one another. And our family is built of strong stuff.</li>
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So wave goodbye to looking back. The future's waiting in all its colour and glory.</div>
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<br />Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-23940294739546953532012-05-22T06:47:00.000-07:002012-05-22T06:47:45.838-07:00Here Comes SummerIt's been almost 2 months since I updated this blog. Time flies... it feels like just a few days ago!<br />
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My daughter is now crawling. What fun that's made for. It's amazing just how many 'things' babies manage to get their hands on around the house. Her preferred 'things to grab' include hair, the dogs, her big brother's books and flowers. So far :)<br />
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She's so beautiful. She sleeps through the night most nights now, waking at around 5:30 or 6. I love hearing her gurgling and mumbling to herself first thing in the morning. She usually wakes just as I am getting up so I peer over her cot and watch her smile. She's starting to make word-like sounds. Not words yet, but she's getting there. She raises her hands up when she sees me in a 'pick me up' motion. And she and I have half hour or so in the living room before waking Mummy up. That's plenty of time for a nappy change, some baby breakfast and some cuddles. Those moments are so precious to me.<br />
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Then I get my son up and he and I both have 'grown up' breakfast together. He gets ready and I drive him to school. It's much nicer in the lighter months too... he's happier getting up early and the impending summer feeling makes the morning more energetic. By the time I get to work, I've already had well over an hour of <i style="font-weight: bold;">quality</i> time with my children. It makes the day start right for me.<br />
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I recently cut my hours in the office back - I worked hard to get my business to a point at which I can enjoy a little more family time and now I'm cashing in on that. This will be the summer for me and my family. I'll be at home more and we have big plans. We're going to go on holidays to the Canaries for a week or so, we're going to do a couple of weekends away in the UK as well. We're going to spend time outside with the dogs, visit zoos and museums. It's our summer.<br />
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And I can't wait for it :)Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1236871300396946713.post-73484779062954335902012-03-28T07:25:00.001-07:002012-03-28T07:25:29.732-07:00PrioritiesOne of my sister's acquaintances had her son taken from her and put into care this week. It turns out she'd been leaving him home for hours and hours in the evening despite him being only 5. She wasn't going out to work or anything - she was going to the pub.<br />
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Drinking.<br />
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Leaving your 5 year old home alone so you can go drinking?!<br />
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What the??<br />
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As a parent, you don't get to prioritise yourself. Yes, you'll make time for yourself as is healthy. But the decisions you make in your day to day life are centred around what's best for your family.<br />
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Everything is affected by having children:<br />
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<br />
<ul>
<li>Where you go</li>
<li>When you go</li>
<li>Who you go with</li>
<li>Where you work</li>
<li>The hours you work</li>
<li>What you watch on TV</li>
<li>the company you keep</li>
<li>Relationships you enter and leave (as a single parent)</li>
</ul>
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It all has to be determined by what's best for you and your children as <b>unit. </b>And as a parent, those decisions never feel like sacrifices because they're for them... they're for those little people whose smiles warm your heart. And that never feels like a hindrance. Never.</div>
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I despise selfish parents. Children are a wonderful gift to life and I can think of many people I know personally who cannot or simply have not had children for one reason or another and who would make <b>spectacular, selfless parents. </b>Seeing and hearing about kids with parents who have no idea about prioritisation and who behave like kids themselves makes me so sad and so angry for the people who would make great parents and who cannot.</div>
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/end rant</div>Josue Habanahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05206950192230375996noreply@blogger.com2